Bribery vs. Politics
by Stuart Taylor, Jr.
Clintongate is getting so multifarious and confusing, it makes your head hurt. Just when you think you’re getting close to figuring out how a couple of political bozos at the White House got hold of confidential FBI files on big-shot Republicans like Jim Baker, Ken Duberstein, Tony Blankley-and more than 400 other people-a bunch of Republican senators across town dump a 769-page report detailing Whitewatergate, Madisongate, Thomasesgate, Nussbaumgate, Williamsgate, Ickesgate, and other subgates of Hillarygate. Then a bunch of Democratic senators dump a nearly 400-page report dismissing the Republicans’ 769 pages as a bunch of bull, to borrow from President Bill Clinton’s elegant rebuttal of allegations by one David Hale.
(Pop math quiz: If the probability that Hillary Rodham Clinton is telling the truth is charitably assumed to be 50-50 on Travelgate, and 50-50 on the belated appearance in her house of her subpoenaed billing records with her fingerprints on them, and 50-50 on her denial that she tried to hide documents in Vincent Foster’s office from investigators after his suicide, and 50-50 on her involvement in the allegedly fraudulent Castle Grande real estate deal, and 50-50 on how she made $100,000 on a $1,000 investment in the commodities market, then what is the probability that she is telling the truth on all five of these things?
Answer: One divided by the number of words in the next paragraph.)
Meanwhile, the Supreme Court is mulling whether to invoke the Constitution to help Clinton’s lawyers stall PaulaJonesgate past the election. And two more erstwhile Clinton banker buddies are on trial in Arkansas.
What’s a body to make of it all? Whom can we trust to give us the straight poop? Alfonse D’Amato-the guy who made $37,125 on a hot stock in a single day in 1993, thanks to special treatment from a brokerage firm? Hah!